Still Searching Five Years Later // 22/01/06

New Year, same job, still searching for some sense of purpose. And What do I have to show for five years this time around? It’s an honest question — appraisal is overdue — but if I’m being honest — which an honest question demands — the answer is “probably plenty”.

Being honest is just harder than being self-deprecating.

Google “making fun of yourself”. What does The Algorithm have to offer? Here’s a glimpse of my personalized portal into truth, 1,300,000,000 responses tabulated and sorted in 0.5 seconds (In order of what? Of something we’ll never comprehend):

• “How making fun of yourself can make you happy — Medical…”
• “Is Making Fun Of Yourself A Good Idea? — Bustle”
• “What’s a the word for people who make fun of themselves?”
• “Self-deprecating humour linked to greater psychological …”
• “Three Ways To Make Fun Of Yourself At Work And Win — Forbes”
• “Sarcasm, Self-Deprecation, and Inside Jokes: A User’s Guide …”
• “How do you make fun of yourself? — Quora”

The Algorithm is here to tell you everything is alright. Self-deprecation — that word you were looking for, you idiot — will make you happier, it will make you look dumb in front of others, it’s your surefire way to Winning At Work (because what else is work for but Winning).

Self-deprecation will be your key to greater psychological “Something”, and The Algorithm has all the best ways to perfect your self-deprecating craft.

These are what the others clicked on, so that must be what you’re looking for. The Algorithm is here to Provide, to sort through a billion shitty links and give you the answers you’re looking for. Whatever you may want to know or believe, there is some YouTuber or Substack blogger or opinion piece writer busy crafting up an expertly delivered, masterfully edited, perfect representation of your shoddy insecurities. Or hope. Or whatever gets you clicking.

Just keep searching.